FAITH

An Old Testament, a credence, or at times sheer conviction… How do you define something that is so abstract, something which usually doesn’t have a physical proof to substantiate itself? But still, we all wake up every morning with faith in one form or the other. The believer wakes up believing there is a higher power that’s going to decide the course of this day, the mother wakes up believing her son at war is safe, the wife wakes up believing her husband would not cheat on her when on a business trip… So yea, it’s abstract but still decides the very course of our existence. It’s the faith in oneself that gets one going; it’s the faith on each other that binds two people in a relationship and its mere faith that keeps the civil order from turning into outright barbaric. Then again, the very fact that faith is such a subjective norm makes its concept rather debatable. One cannot generalize where to draw the line between faith and obscure hunches. And it’s when this line is crossed; the consequences can be rather dire. It is surprising how the Wikipedia page for ‘faith’ primarily focuses on religious doctrines instead of dealing with the concept of faith on a more generic plateau. What might seem to be a rather trivial observation has rather sinistrous effects when one takes into account the religious extremism at work at all corners of the world. Fanatic movements driven in the name of faith is a common head line in the dailys across the world. The word - Faith was probably coined as a word for belief and affirmation, but over the years it seems to be have taken a completely different connotation, it has been narrowed down consistently to religious palette and being used as an excuse to carry out fanatic crusades. And it’s definitely not articles written over a cup of Latte that can revive the word Faith to its original form, it’s only when we let our sense of better judgement choose what to bestow our faith in when we wake up every morning, would it be the clichéd better place to live in.

The Chaotic Order

CHOAS; the word that literally negates order in any form…. the word that epitomizes unpredictability and disturbance. Then again, such is the irony of existence, that chaos itself is instrumental in laying the foundation of a new order. Its chaos and unrest that led to major revolutions in the course of history, it’s the chaos of the human mind that gave birth to Renaissance, it’s the chaos of colors that paint the sky in its dusky hues…

To be complacent is human, and with complacency comes a dearth of evolution. It’s the unrest of human mind and the mayhem of nature that has inked the parchments of history. It’s the chaotic drifts of clouds that bring the monsoon, it’s the disarray blow of the wind that guides the sail across seas, it takes a rebel to overthrow monarchy….and each of these bring about a new order. Right from childhood, we are taught to look at the word ‘chaos’ with a certain degree of contempt, something we are advised to avert to maintain the order of conventions. But with age one realizes that ‘order’ in whichever form comes with its shelf life; and conventions are bound to augmentations. Chaos is like that the forbidden apple of Eden, the more you trying restraining it at bay the more it floods the civilization of conventions. Like most aspects of life one needs to look at the word Chaos without pre conceived notions, the first image that comes to your mind might be that the hustle of cars on the street on a Monday morning or that of your unkept college dorm. But look at it as the spark in the mind of Einstein or the turbulent thinking of Da’ Vinci … and you will see the word chaos in a totally new perspective.

I am not advocating a destructive rebellious attitude to cause havoc in an otherwise congenial ambience. It’s about realizing that change is inevitable for survival and evolution; and every change is preceded by a certain degree of chaos. It’s about keeping your mind open to that unrest, to break open the shell of complacency. The spark of chaos can make civilizations fall and it’s the same chaos that can give birth to renaissance. While idealists love to cling to conventional orders, the sands of time is bound to raise the storm of chaos and bring about the new order...and then man adopts to this new order, suddenly oblivious to the chaos which was instrumental in bringing about this change of order...

And then the blog gathers dust...

And then someone asks me at a party, do u blog? The question just leaves me with....errmmm...yea I do have blog but haven’t posted anything new for a while now…
The next thing I know is I’m checking my blog from the phone; and then the realization daunts on me that it hasn’t just been a while but eons that I have not written or at least not posted anything new (the second realization being, I CANNOT live without internet on my phone).


The blog was created in a spurt of enthusiasm on a rather lazy summer afternoon a couple of summers ago with a resolve to never let it gather dust and a rather unspoken hope of making the blog rather popular (something which every second amateur blogger hopes before clicking on that ‘Post’ button for the 1st time). But now it is something I had hoped it would never be: an archaic; almost extinct URL…..obscured under the dust of time and ignorance. The thought brings me to try the good old concept of self-introspection ( self-introspection; the virtue of self evolution the elders have always advocated but for me it’s been a word that sounds fancy, that has always left me more confused every time I tried it…). It’s not like I was living the life of an enslaved miner burrowing sun up and sun down, I did have ample time to loaf around, sketch, swim, party, to be active on the social networking sites and laze around…then why was the blog ignored? So time was definitely not an issue. Neither was getting hold of an idea the major, maybe it was just a self critical me that kept me from posting my humdrum thoughts off late.

Some people have popular blogs and it enables them to do incredible things. Some get book deals. Some make decent money monthly from it. Some do some incredible things that they document. Some blog to reach out their fans; for others it’s just an attempt to keep up with their peer in college.


That’s when I asked myself, what made me blog in the first place. It was neither of the above stated reasons. It was just to diary my random volley of thoughts… To pen down those humdrum and at times rather abstract ideas… And to look back at them later with a certain degree of perspective and contempt. So merely the flair for pondering on these random thoughts should be good enough to keep this blog going, I need not make any ceremonious resolution to be regular on the blog, or how articulate the language of the post is or who much a reader would appreciate it….. Hope this attitude would help broom off some of the dust that has gathered here…..

Is it just NAMEsake….

The idealists love to quote Shakespeare’s ‘What’s there in the name’ (do not recollect the exact archaic phrasing), but how relevant is this supposedly immortal quote in today’s urban chaos. Today we are all in a rat-race to carve out a niche for our names. It’s the name that gives you power and recognition under the sun. It is not surprising when a 5year old promptly corrects you when you spell her name wrong; such is the dearness of our names we grow up with. Right from couples fighting to get that perfect name for their baby, to the rebellious teen blaming his parents for giving him such a lame name….there seems no truce when it comes to the ‘name’. Its your name that can make your life through high school a living hell, its your name that can help you get a coveted job( your last name i.e.), its your name that can help you get past the door of a crowded pub or even come handy to pickup a girl at the bar….
Mundane reasons apart the concept of one’s name is certainly a double edged dagger because when we hear a name instead of associating it solely with the individual(the prime purpose of the concept of name) we end up associating it to his/her bloddline, religion, caste, creed…the list seems to be never ending. It is man’s this subjective outlook of one’s name that has complicated the whole concept. When we hear the names Ibraham and Arthur we do end up associating it with their religion, tracing back to their nationality and at times even stereotyping. These are the preconceived notions that have given the name the ability to draw borders and even shed blood since time in memorial. What was supposed to be a mere means of identification has numerous societal strings attached with it that can put you at an advantage our make the walk of life a little more difficult. The world would be a better place if we associated the name solely with the individual….without any concern of his lineage, religion or nationality. Each one of us are striding here to carve out our names on the stone in given our lifetimes, so ideally the world should not be biased on the basis of the name he goes by….
Then again what looks impressive on paper barely finds its place in the real world practice. We are humans, and basic instincts are always tough to overcome, but then again there can always be a beginning…. So the next time you meet a person acknowledge him for the individual he is and not what his name conveys….Let him and his conducts define his name and the other way round…then maybe tomorrow would be a better place to live in…

Good ole days…

Why did the world seem so simple when we were kids. When the only major used to be to convince parents to let us play for that extra half an hour. We perceived the world so differently when we were shorter than the fridge. Mom’s hug was the very definition of love, Dad was the strongest man ever, Grandma’s fables brought a smile on our faces before falling asleep, and even a bar of dairy milk was enough to contend us. Getting high meant standing on the rooftop and bad was yet to become the new good. Telephone was meant to get in touch with distant cousins and cell phones were an alien device. Video games could keep us going across the longest summer afternoons without any complains, when family dinners and birthdays were all that parting meant. Politics, malice and manipulations weren’t a part of our vocabulary. Man’s best gift to his kind was chocolate. Acquaintance and friend were synonyms. The eyes shone with spark of innocence; and the genuineness & warmth of that smile simply priceless. A time when the hues of fantasy and reality mixed on the palette of life. There were movies you were barred to see and magazines not allowed to read, reasons you never knew, minds brimming with questions, some of which left subtly unanswered by the adults. When bedtime used to 9pm and the 6:30 alarm meant a gush to get ready for school. Night-life was limited to late dinner parties with loud aunties engrossed in gossip and balding uncles engrossed in supposed to be intellectual discussions over whiskey, while we had our ball over rather mundane games. Sundays meant an eager wait to accompany Dad to the market, and a siesta hearty Sunday meal. Weekdays flew away in School; School a word that needs no description…seven hours of exuberant fun blended with the studies( read the teacher teaching while we are in our own world of bliss), and with friends boredom and monotony found no place even in the confines of the classroom. The fun during those 20minutes of recess unmatched today even by parting at the plushest of the night club. The Games period that kept us on the toes for the complete 50minutes of the previous period. A time when attending social functions weren’t such a pain in the arse. A talking dog and his group of wacky friends or a cat-mouse chase was the very definition of television (not to forget home theatre was an alien concept). The list would be ever ending…something to which each one of us can add a new think every time we reflect back on time. An as I barely brush my teeth and walk out of the house early morning, I see a group of a school kids dressed in white boarding a school bus, I just smile and jog past…to a new day and to life…

Shadow:

It walks with you on a lonely moonlit night, sits by you on a candlelight dinner, and stands by when you light the bonfire… Call it a natural phenomenon or a manifestation of your very existence; it proves itself to be an abiding companion. It stood by you when you queued to gain entry to that rock concert and sat by you when you secretly wept on the basketball court after a breakup. Been a companion by your side, alike in both rejoice and agony, there to share all shades that life has to offer. It seems like a friend who has always been there, would follow you till the brink of earth, always lends an ear to your pensive thoughts still never passes a judgment. People may be black or white, rich or poor, Hindu or Muslim but the shadow evades all these differences. Breaking all bounties disparity and creed, the same dark cohort sits by the poor begging for alms and trails the superstar on the red carpet. It braves the scorching heat before you on the sunny day and watches your back on a lonely night.


Some literature and myths may symbolize it as a sign of gloom or malevolence, but for me my shadow symbolizes that even when it seems totally dark there is still a gleam of light somewhere to incarnate the shadow. When your shadow leaves you that’s when you should realize that it can’t get any darker. I see no streak of grim in my shadow nor any stroke of gloom, it’s a reflection of my being, a companion who knows no gold or rag, and will stand by me throughout my walk of life...

On being 20….(in India…)

[*This is not even most distantly a literary piece, just a volley of thoughts with gross ignorance to grammar and conventional writing styles.]

Still standing on the threshold of adolescence and adulthood... Parents expecting you to be responsible adults when it comes to your conducts, while restraining your freedom on the pretext that ‘you are not yet matured enough to make your own decisions’. A phase each one of us has lived or are still living…

Fired by the intense desire to make it big, to outrun the rest and snatch your coveted position under the sun, while longing to relive the innocence of childhood at the same time. The peer pressure that strongly dominated our lives back in high school seems to have taken a backseat, though their influence on our everyday life still inevitable. A phase of battle between making our presence felt to the world ,and escaping to world of carefree oblivion…

Howsoever enigmatic the above lines may sound, these are golden years. We may loathe about the absence of the freedom (freedom, the word we have learned to worship since stepping into our teens) that our counterparts in the west live; but an innocent smile ‘here’ helps us get away as kids even now. It’s a time of rediscovering yourself and what you want from your life and this world, it’s the phase when parents slack the noose of parenting to ‘let us be’, the smell of this new found liberty inexplicable.

But for most of us today,in urban India, barring basic academic obligations and maybe an occasional summer internship, the word responsibility and other allied ‘big’ words are thrown into the sack of stupor. It’s the time to rejoice and live those last few carefree days before being stamped as adults with heap load of responsibilities to last a lifetime. This age is about burning the midnight oil before exams because you had befriended procrastination for the rest of the semester; convincing parents that extra circulars are equally (rather more :P ) important as grades on the resume so pursuing them is a necessity and not our bail for ignoring academics. It’s the time when you have that fag of cigarette with friends and then using the deodorant to make sure the hostel authorities do not take notice of it. It’s about waking up with a bad hangover from the ‘shots’ at the party last night and convincing each other(read friends) over lunch to never try ones ‘capacity’ again, only to forget it by the next Friday.

A time when facebook & googletalk are no less than a parallel to our very existence, unable to explain elders how your fingers seem totext and chat with a mind of their own…. A time when everyone is convinced(what else are friends for…) that ‘Hukha’ barely has any tobacco and that Mocha and Seesha are Gods bequest for mortals like us to unwind, and in the senior year every weekend is equivalent to parting under the pretext that it’s the last year together(with friends). It’s a phase when life without internet seems no less than an exile to Guantanamo Bay… and downloading movies and songs online is not even distantly regarded as piracy... Googling for the the pub with least cover charge, searching for the latest cellphone scheme with maximum discount charges, bragging that Simpson’s tshirt that you always wanted while your Dad is amused by the fact that you are sporting a cartoon chest print at 20!

The above lines may portray a very irresponsible and flawed picture. But it is just one side of the coin. Yes, we are impulsive at this juncture, driven by the fire to live most of what life has to offer, snatch our piece of this materialistic world. I do not deny that most of us want to have a piece of the cake and eat it too, but we are aware of the fact that we are nearing the hour to brave the world. We have lived our share of the innocent childhood and the carefree teens, its only a matter a time before we have to spread our wings and fly out of the nest into the open sky, the sky that does not merely offer freedom but also bring about responsibility and obligations, of family, friends, conducts and oneself. We do know that scores on the grade sheets today are a parchment that would affect the fate of our lives tomorrow. The parties and long drives are not an escapade, rather a rendezvous with our youth and innocence. They are not an excuse the snub adulthood but a reflection of who we still are, memoirs of the teens and a rejoice of the present. A phase that our parents have lived and smile back upon, and something even we would cherish seated in plush cabins, defining the epitome of responsibility in the years to come. But for now while we do justice to our academics and conduct, we want to party and live every moment that life has to offer, to keep the kid within alive and still carve out our niche in this humongous ocean…